Day 35: words you live by, why do you like them

 

Because life is shitty man. When you’re 5 and you tear your knee open on the playground, it feels like the end of the world. When you’re 6 and your best friend moves away, it feels like the end of the world. When you’re 8 and you find out your family dog has gone missing, it feels like the end of the world. When you’re 11 and you have to switch schools. When you’re 14 and you ‘become a woman.’ When you’re 15 and your boyfriend breaks up with you. When you’re 18 and your best friend goes for your ex. When you’re 19 and you find out your boyfriend is a cocaine addict. When you’re 19 and your nephew’s father commits suicide. When you’re 19 and you drop out of college… I mean, shit has been happening to people since the beginning of time, and we’ve been okay.

See the tricky part about it is, it’s not ACTUALLY the end of the world. That’s the thing, the universe isn’t going to deal you anything that you can’t handle. No matter how old you are, things are going to keep happening, and it’s going to feel like the worst thing that has ever happened in your life. And I’m not trying to discount the bad things that have happened in your life, the bad shit in mine was fucking bad. Nothing I couldn’t handle though, and that’s really all I’m trying to say. The worst thing in the world when I was 6 was my best friend moving away and at 19 was when my nephew’s father committed suicide, two awful things but on insanely opposite ends of the scale, you know? And the pain of some of these things never really goes away 100%, I mean… David’s death is something that resonates with me OFTEN, but I’m not in nearly as bad of a place as I was 4 years ago. We get up, we dust ourselves off and we keep fucking going, because if we didn’t… What the hell else would we do?

I mean. Out of my almost 9,000 days so far on this planet, not once has anything gotten the best of me. They’ve come close, but if you can try to put it in perspective then that is less than 10 situations that I even used as examples. That is like a week work of notable bad shit that has happened in my 24 years of existence. And while many of these things were life altering and soul changing, in the grand scheme of attitudes and life outlooks, those days were nothing. Because I also have the day my best friends dared me to glue a fake nail to my nose as a dare at a birthday party in grade school.. and when we GOT our dog.. When my dad would come home from his deployments. When my sister stuck up for me to her friends. When I got to be the Voice of Tallwood and do the announcements in school. When I won the science fair in the fourth grade. When I started playing the cello. When we got our other dog. When I got my first kiss. When I went to Hawaii. When I went to Ireland. When I went to Canada. When I went to Niagara Falls. When I learned how to drive. When I made Madrigals. When I first fell in love. My first time. When I went to Prom. When I graduated High School. When I went away to college. When my nephew was born. When my sister got married. Falling BACK in love. Moving to Louisiana for love.  Getting to come home…

There are so many more good things that happen to us.. The bad stick out, but the good is what gives us that drive to continue every day, and that’s exactly what we have to do.

Bad shit happens. But it’s not the end of the world.

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